Beyond Pain
by hislips
Summary: If their fate was to be forever separated, Hikari and Kei will find a way... Even if it takes everything, including their lives.


**Author's Note: **This story was re-written because I personally think that it need some improvement. All of my old fics will be re-written so this is the second story that I rewrite. Not lot of changes but THERE ARE CHANGES! Especially in the last part. So please have some time again and read&review! :)

**Warning:** Not because I re-write it, it doesn't mean that it won't have any grammatical or spelling errors. I am still a writer-in-the-making so I admit that I needed improvement. Nonetheless, any interested beta-readers will be appreciated, so... anyone?

**Disclaimer:** Didn't own anything and So sorry for writing this!

**Beyond Pain**

"I want you to do something that will stay you away from Kei… You're a nuisance to him…"

"What are you saying? Takishima is my rival and my important friend! You can't do anything to make me stay away from him!"

"I can Hanazono-san… I can put pressure to your family and your S.A. friends' family… If you don't stay away from him, you'll ruin his future as the most successful heir of the Takishima group… He will suffer the consequences as well…" Kaname warns her with his calm yet cold tone that made her spine prickle with fear.

"Hanazono-san…" Aoi Ogata said from her behind, "Please accept the President's order… It's for your own good… It's for you friends' sake and for Kei-sama as well…"

She stands there for awhile, hard like a statue but she can hear her heart breaking into million pieces. No matter how much she denies it to herself, she knows what this man is capable of and she knows he will pull all strings just to accomplish what he wanted.

There's no sense of saying no to him especially if her friends and Kei's future are at stake.

"What do you want me to do?" Hikari's voice cracks as she tried her best to not any tears to fall down.

The President smirks, "Marry someone else…"

_Flash…_

"What do you mean this is our last battle?" Kei asked while struggling to deny to himself the true impact of her words. Deep inside, he discerns what she was talking about but then, he can't accept it.

This can't be true.

"I will leave now. Takishima…" she said cold and unemotional. She turns her back to him for she doesn't want to see him breaking because she is breaking as well.

"Wha-What?" He pathetically asks still denying the evident fact.

"Goodbye…" is her only reply before leaving him unmoving on his track.

_Flash…_

"What? You accept to marry me?" He unbelievably asks hesitantly to ingrain the words he just heard from her mouth.

"Yes… Iori…" She replied. She seems smiling but her breathing gives her sharp stabbing pain.

"I am so happy!" He exclaimed before pulling her into a tight embrace and she knows, this time, he will not let go of her. He is beyond happy and that was an understatement but he was not aware that the eyes of the girl he was holding was stinging, burning at the sensation of holding back the tears. Tears for losing the guy she really, really, really loves.

"Takishima…" she whispered and tears started to fall.

_Flash…_

"What? You will marry Tokiwa?" the S.A. members chorused except Kei that seems to be shot dead in his spot.

Hikari feebly nods and decline to look at Kei.

All looked at her in shocked but it quickly replaced with despair, especially him.

_Flash…_

"Takishima…"

_Flash…_

She looks at herself in the mirror. She is in white flowing dress with her hair neatly groomed and her face covered with nice make up. She keeps staring at her reflection in the big mirror while those memories keep flashing and flashing in her mind. Her tears are again threatening to pour down on her cheeks.

"You look beautiful, Hikari…" Akira whispers to her. If this wedding is with Kei, she must be jumping with glee because she was chosen to be the bride's maid of her favourite friend but this is a different case and she didn't even think to be happy. She can feel the sorrow Hikari feels today and it will be until she was alive.

"Thank you…" she whispered.

She picks up the long gown of her dress and walks to the exit door of her dressing room.

It's almost the time.

* * *

The S.A. members, including Kei stands at the back, near the entrance of the church. They really don't want to be here but they have to, it is still Hikari's wedding.

Even if they know she _is_ marrying the wrong man.

As it starts to begin, flower girls, ring bearer and the bride's maid walks down the aisle followed by the girl prettiest of them all, Hikari.

Kei can feel his eyes stinging and his heart pounding so hard it hurts to the point that he clutches his chest. It was excruciating.

She is so beautiful, but the pang of knowing that Hikari is about to marry another man and not him, just adds to the load of his devastated heart. He can't take this but for her sake, he will stay a little longer and will accept anything that may help to crush his heart even more.

The ceremony proceeds. Hikari tilts her head downwards looking at her feet not moving and not looking at her groom. She remained petrified in her spot and the want of running away is increasing every second, but she can't. She knows very well that she can't.

The S.A. members just watch the ceremony unenthusiastically and Kei bitterly accept everything.

It's time.

"Do you, Tokiwa Iori, take this woman to become your beloved wife-?"

Hikari can hear the words of the priest, but the meaning doesn't register in her mind. She can hear it, but she refuse to understand it.

"I do…" She hear him gleefully replied.

Now, it is her turn.

"Do you, Hanazono Hikari, take this man-?"

She can't understand a thing again. Suddenly, her eyes hurt so badly. It stings, it burns. She tried to shut her eyes but the tears were too much. It flows down on her cheeks, and she silently cried.

Iori gasped at the sudden tears in her eyes, but he reckons that brides are normally emotional on their wedding day so he will let this one slip and maybe, confront her later.

But he didn't know that he was wrong, so wrong.

Hikari's tears are her sorrows; overwhelming and can't be hold back no matter how much she tried to suppress it. This is for the man she truly loves. For more than ten years, he became her life. His challenges, his teases, his unedifying talents, his face, his voice and his smiles became a big part of her and now that she will belong to somebody else, she didn't know how to continue living without his traits… without him.

The priest had already done his speech and everybody's eyes land on her waiting for her response, except Kei that is looking at the ground.

She knows very well that this is not the right thing to do, but she have to.

"I…I do…" she finished it.

Her chest explodes. She was dying. Nothing more will hurt than this.

Takishima Kei is and will forever be out of her life.

Her respond to this ridiculous vow is like million of knives taking the pleasure of stabbing his heart. He closes his eyes and he can feel the moist sipping in the corner of his eyelids. He just lost her. He didn't even have the chance to say his real feelings for her. She just slips out from his firm grasp and he can't do anything about it.

He was dying and he can't take it any longer.

"I'll leave now…" He said to his S.A. friends. He hides his destroyed expression behind his light brown locks and without a word, goes away.

His friends don't bother to utter a word. They know that this is too painful for him and they understand.

Kei walks away from the church not having the slightest idea to where to go.

He saw his car that was park several meters away from the church and the urge of wanting to be away there as soon as possible is greatly increasing.

He enters inside his black car and put the keys to the ignition to start the car. He was about to start the engine but the overwhelming pain bubbles up in his head. He was so depressed, sad, betrayed, angry and most off all, impaired. He slaps his hand in the steering wheel and suddenly, all of the feelings came down like stones. He punched it and hit it like it was the very reason of his pain and agony.

After his hands became red and blisters started to appear, he stopped and rests his reddened hand in the steering wheel then lean his head over it.

Clang… Clang…

The bells of the church make the noise. The wedding is over. And for the last time, it reminded it of him that she was no longer in his reach.

"Hikari…" he muttered.

Since they were eight years old, he unselfishly loves her. All this time, he tried so hard to remain number one so to not lose the very thing that binds them, rivalry. All this time, he secretly looks at her in the corner of his eyes, all this time, he secretly admires her, dream of her and takes care of her. All those times are now over. She is now married to a man and all those things don't matter now. She will never know how he feels for her.

He lifted his chin up to look outside of his front mirror and the blinding sunlight of noon blinds him, but no matter how much it burns, he never cared.

"Hikari… I don't want you to leave me…" he uttered helplessly but who will listen and who will care when the very person whom he desperately wants to hear him is now, and forever be out of his life.

"Hikari…" he whispered desperately and he lean his forehead back to the back of his still reddened hands.

Then for the first time, for the very first time in his dull, pathetic and busy life, tears come out from his eyes and he cries.

Before, he used to say: for better or for worst, only Hikari can move his stoic heart but now, she is the very reason why it wants to cease moving.

He cried so hard like he never cried before. His reddened hand covers his face and roughly pulls his hair. He sits there alone, crying helplessly with no Hikari to hold him. He is all alone suffering from the most terrible pain he ever felt in his entire life.

* * *

Night came and Kei lay on his bed burying his face and his chest in to the bed sheets. He is still in his formal attire he wears for the wedding. Dishevelled, messy and scruffy, he lays there silently, not moving, not sleeping. His eyes are opened and red, tired and torn but the tears keep flowing in his eyes and he can tell that it will never stop.

Weakly, he travels his eyes to one part of his room where it was filled with her memories; his desk full of gifts that were from her.

Putting all his strength to stand up, he goes to that part of the room and pick up his favourite of them all, the Hikari doll she handmade together with all the S.A. dolls.

He smiles as he remembers how he gets it from her. He can still feel the tears flowing from his eyes, but he didn't bother to wipe it, it'll be just useless like wiping the pouring rain from the sky that currently occurs outside.

A sudden feeling creeps to his head.

He wants to see her one last time, just one more time even if it was only to say goodbye.

He hurriedly goes outside with the doll still in his hand. He didn't even bother to change or fix himself, he just let the heavy pouring rain soak his disarray body.

He looks above and the rain drop hits his face. It's like the rain sympathize with his feelings. Kei half smile and half frown, at least in the rain, his tears can be covered up.

He walks roughly and a guy unintentionally bumps him and makes him drop his doll to the floor of the street. Weakly and clumsily walking, he picks it up and brushes the doll's hair.

"Don't leave me soon…" he said like he was really talking to the real person.

Just then, blinding lights come closer. It's hard to see, he can't see anything just light, bright lights.

_Hikari…_

CREECH!... THUG!...

Kei laid in the cold ground after the impact bowl him there. Limbs are broken; ribs were cracked and painfully stabbed the part of his lungs. Internal haemorrhage made his throat cough of blood and a part of his head is badly wounded causing blood to withdraw. He is destroyed physically but he managed to protect his precious doll.

His eyes hazily look at the panicking people gathering around him. He can hear them shout and yell in tremor.

"Get a hold of yourself!"

"Can someone call an ambulance?"

"Get some he-"

"Will you-"

"…"

In his mind, he can't understand a word they are saying. It becomes more unclear as each second passes by but strangely, he feels fine because he feels nothing now.

Despite the struggling, he still manages to turn his head to the doll he protected. Although it was covered with his own blood, it was still whole and in safe hands.

"I am glad it is safe…" he smiles.

As he lay there silently, he can see his life flashes before his eyes. A lot of people he remembers, His mother, His father, Sui, The President, the regular student of Hakusenkan, Aoi, Yahiro, Sakura, Jun, Megumi, Ryuu, Tadashi, Akira and –

"Hikari…" he murmured.

His mind now flashes of images of Hikari: her frown, her annoyance, her tears, her cheerfulness and her smile, her loving smile.

It doesn't hurt anymore. He can't feel anything even though his body is destroyed and his heart was broken, it doesn't hurt anymore.

The most important for him now are the images of Hikari in his thoughts. At least in his mind, she is smiling at him.

"Kei…" he can hear her call.

He smiles. He looks up to the weeping sky as the raindrops hits his bloody face.

"I love you…" he says it one last time as the last tear slips in the corner of his eyes.

He closes his golden eyes. And it will never open again.

His heart stops moving but at least it can never feel pain.

"Hikari…" the last word he will ever speak.

* * *

She coughed and something white and liquid emitted from her mouth. She spat it out but the aching feeling is anywhere but better.

Physical pain and emotional pain mixed in unison making it as the worst feeling she ever felt. But a little smile draws from her lips for she knows that this will not last long.

"Hikari! Hikari! Open the door! Please Hikari!"

She can hear Iori's yell from the outside of the bathroom but he will not come in. He can't because everything that her hand had landed on was used to prevent the bathroom door from opening. She locked herself inside.

She continued to throw up in the sink but the pain in her guts was too much and causes her to ungracefully stumble in the floor.

The medicine bottle of the anti-depressant was knocked by her arms and rolled on the bathroom floor. The lid opened and revealed oval shaped tablets. Only two was left because the rest of it was digested in Hikari's body.

Hikari never knew that poisoning will be this crucial and painful, but she doesn't mind it now.

Her face became paper white and the sweat emitting from her body was cold. The beautiful bridal gown was officially ruined and she couldn't care less.

She was getting numb and it was alright. The excruciating pain was slowly fading from her senses, it didn't hurt anymore but she felt so, so, so weak.

Lying in the bathroom floor, Hikari glanced at the ceiling and all she can see was the face of her beloved.

"Takishima…" she whispered.

"Hikari! Answer me! Hikari! HIKARI!" Iori yells outside the door clearly panicking.

She can't hear it anymore, nothing can't be heard. Soon, she closed her eyes and she will rest. Next time she opens it, she hopes she will see Kei. She can hope, for now.

"I love you…" she whispered.

"Kei…"

* * *

_How was it? Please READ AND REVIEW! :)_

_-hislips_


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